You may be 18, 25, 32, or 40 reading this.
Wherever you are in life, this is something I wish someone had told me — softly, lovingly — the way an older sister would.
Because parents tell us things, but we don’t listen.
Friends don’t know how to explain it.
And life… gives lessons only after you’ve broken down a few times.
Life Isn’t Chaos — We Just Never Built a Home Inside
Imagine you’re stuck inside a tornado.
Winds pulling you in every direction.
Your heart racing.
Vision blurry.
Mind messy.
Just praying you survive.
That’s what anxiety feels like.
Then imagine you're watching the same tornado — but from inside a safe home.
You can still see the chaos, but you’re protected.
The tornado will pass.
Because storms don't last forever.
This is how problems are.
When we’re inside them, they feel permanent.
But when we have a “home” inside us, problems lose their power.
None of us were taught this
We were taught:
what’s right or wrong
how to be “good”
what society approves
But no one taught us:
how to handle real problems
how to stay grounded
how to not fall apart internally
And so in our 20s, every problem feels like the end of the world.
Temporary escapes only bury the problem
We run to friends
We watch shows
We shop
We eat
We scroll
It works for a moment.
But the problem doesn't go away — it hides.
And then it becomes bigger.
Until it’s too big to sweep under the carpet.
The Lowest moment of 2021
There was a point in 2021 when I felt completely lost.
Everything confused me.
Problems didn't end.
I didn’t know who I was anymore.
And then something someone said changed everything.
My brother asked me one simple question:
“What is your security?
Where do you feel safe as a person?”
It shocked me.
I had never thought about it.
Nobody ever asked me that.
That was the beginning of everything.
We think money, relationships, looks, success give security.
But none of these stay forever:
Money can be lost
Beauty fades
People may leave
Careers change
So what is permanent?
The One Question You Must Ask Yourself
“If everything goes wrong… who am I?
What will still be mine?
What foundations can never be taken away?”
When you find that answer, that becomes your home inside.
You don’t panic when problems come,
because you’re not standing outside in the tornado anymore.
You’re grounded.
Don’t rush the answer
Don’t look for:
first thoughts
surface words
generic answers
Go deep.
As deep as possible.
Your truth isn’t what others decide.
It’s not what society labels you.
It’s not what people say you are.
It’s something only you can define.
When you know who you are, storms can’t destroy you
You don’t avoid problems anymore.
You face them.
Head-on.
Not because you’re fearless,
but because you’re rooted.
You know your worth.
You know your identity.
You know your foundation.
That is what I wish someone told me in my 20s
I wish someone held my hand and said:
“Build a home inside you before storms come.
Because storms will come… and go.
But your home will remain.”
And even if one day something destroys that home —
you will have the wisdom to build it again.
So I’m passing this lesson to you
Ask yourself:
Who am I… when nothing external remains?
What is my security… when life takes everything away?
Find that.
That is your anchor.
That is your peace.
That is your strength. 👍
❤️ Simmy Goraya
Write a comment ...